What’s your poison?

According to the Food and Drink Federation, which ran its fifth Food Safety Week last month, 6 per cent of UK adults claim to have suffered food poisoning every year, resulting in 23 million lost working days.

Penny Lyon, new-business manager of IBH subsidiary Hurricane, has come up with an alternative breakdown of “food poisoning-related” absences: Mondays 22 per cent; alcoholic excess 21 per cent; days after bank holidays 9 per cent; day after the first night with a new girl/boyfriend 15 per cent; expecting a bad day in the office and the weather’s nice 32 per cent; food poisoning 1 per cent.

Lyon insists that the figures are not based on staff at Hurricane. But anyone there contemplating a sickie will need a better excuse than “It’s something I ate.”