Souped up brains prefer beer

Talk of Elmwood head honcho Jonathan Sands’ Damascene conversion to the joys of meditation, fruit juice and fruit in the pursuit of spiritual creativity and making the other half of his brain work brings to mind an old story about Callum Lumsden.

Just as Jonathan is encouraging all the Elmwood tribe to get into the ethos of healthy foods for a healthy mind, so Tilney Lumsden Shane used to get some geezer in to cook lunch for everyone.

No pie, chips or chilled Sancerre type stuff either, but good wholesome vegetables, peculiar fruit, soup and brainy fish and agua minerale all round.

It was, allegedly, years before anyone told Callum that while the staff appeared to be joining in the spirit of things, munching happily with sparks flying creatively around their craniums, they used to go off after dining for a swift “meditate” in The White Horse over the road.

One can only hope that beef was not on the TLS “healthy” menu in those offal days of the mid-Eighties.

Meanwhile, Elmwood’s very own Svengali should be wary of staff disappearing to “meditate” using the mantra “Joshua Tetley, Joshua Tetley”. Jonathan, you have been warned.

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